Post surgery

So - just so all my readers out there know, I am alive, I made it out of the operating theater. I'm back home, and doing relatively well, Thank God. The hours between 10 and 4 seem to be my best, although this morning I was up at 5, ready to go to the airport to see my inlaws land as new olim (immigrants to Israel).
Yesterday, I had more visitors than, I think, ever. Leah came to visit with Kinneret, and then a co-worker brought some gifts from the dept. Now, I'm not a flower person, and my close friends know that, but I do appreciate the thoughts. But I have no clue what to do with flowers, and I placed the entire bouquet down on the table, right next to my open laptop! No, not my open laptop - the departments open laptop!!!! Arugh. Was depressed about it for the rest of the day. I'm going to send it on Sunday with the same co-worker and hopefully it will be fixed by the time I get back. It must be Gods message telling me not to do any work while I am away.
I also hope that my boss is too busy with the departmental merger to have time to tell me off too much. It really does suck though.
My co-worker also brought a box of chocolates, which in my depression, I proceeded to finish off. Then had a slice of pizza for supper, resulting in serious blockage. When really I'm supposed to be not so blocked at this point, since my body is producing 1/3 more bile than it should. But no, I'm pretty stopped up, even now, the next day.
For now, I've put the laptop away (this is Bens, somehow he trusts me to touch it), and am not worrying about it until Sat night, when I have to get it over to my co-workers. And then Sunday morning, when she has to get it to IT. But not now, now I'm not worrying about it.
In the meantime - my inlaws are here! And so is my converter for my coffeemaker, which I think I've already busted :).
They love their apartment, and are getting settled. I'm hoping to go out for dinner because I again don't want to cook (even if it means being uncomfortable for another night and another day....).
Its awfully hard having no responsibilities. Especially when you keep screwing things up. And the thing is, when you have nothing to do, you touch a lot of things you shouldn't.

Surgery today

Surgery today at 6:30. At the hospital by 2-ish. Fasting by 12:30. Slightly nervous, had lots of strange dreams last night.
Neither Ben nor I slept well. I woke up in the middle of the night with a sore throat and worried they would cancel surgery.
Called hospital today to see if Ben can stay with me overnight, and yes he can - but "why do you need your husband?". Grrr. Because he loves me and wants to stay with me in the hospital, even just for one night, and even in an uncomfortable chair or sleeping on the floor.
My mom is with Eden. At first Eden wanted to "come with me" to the hospital. But I think she understands that I'm going to get my tummy fixed, because it didn't feel well. And that she gets to color and sing songs and play and watch movies with Savta. Hope that goes well.
At least some respite from the religion discussion. Apparently I've got a big chip on my shoulder when it comes to religion - well duh! Its been there for at least 15 years, I'm glad someone noticed it!
Faith in God, faith in doctors and modern medicine. Faith in private hospitals, and faith in life. A will to live and persevere.
And looking forward to 2 weeks off from work.

Then - here come the in-laws!

Some ideas

So I've been a bit depressed lately about work. It seems that as soon as I started to enjoy it, and feel appreciated and feel like I may be going somewhere, that I also get in on all the nasty things that go on. It doesn't make me too happy, and Im only just starting to understand. One website put it really well,
"Each corporation is as much a living, breathing, and consuming being as is a human. Just as your cells fight for the survival of the human, corporate politics is not about the individual, it is about the survival of the corporation. By understanding where the line exists that separates your two worlds and adapting to the idea that political motivation is about results, then indeed, your interaction within this strange, new world will be more effective and successful."
People I used to really like and look to as role models - well, lets say I'm still a bit disillusioned. I've gotten a bit more perspective and still look to them as role models, and it is interesting to watch how they handle sticky situations. And amazing to watch real masters at corporate politics - how do you manage in one spot for 10 years!
Another interesting thing about my company is that there are so many people who really are nice. How do they manage it? I'd like to think that as long as I remain true to myself, keep work a priority (which is also a part of being true to myself by the way), and stick to my guns, I'll last.

Doing lots of thinking, not quite formulated at this point.....

The Book Meme

So I saw this meme (what does meme mean?) up for grabs and I took it.

I do actually love reading, so I was surprised when I saw how few of these books I had read. I mean, if this is any measurement, I am seriously not well read. But there is a lot of classics here, as well as modern bestsellers, of which I don't like either. I don't really like things that "most people recommend" - meaning I probably would end up liking them but its hard to pick it up if everyone else is.

I still have not bought crocs and probably will only once they go out of style.

I either get to it early before anyone else does, or have to wait until nobody is doing it anymore.
And I don't like sad books. Hence Dickens, and classic tragedies are out. If I am reading a book, it is for entertainment and relaxation. I don't read to be frightened, angry, or saddened. I read to laugh, enjoy, and fall in love.

The books in bold are books I've read. Red means recommended.

But here goes:

• 1984 This should be mandatory reading for everybody.
• The Aeneid I read this too long ago, and in high school which means that I probably didn't appreciate it.
• The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay Never did get around to finishing it ....
• American Gods
• Anansi Boys
• Angela’s Ashes : A Memoir - eh. Not so my style. Too sad
• Angels & Demons
• Anna Karenina
• Atlas Shrugged Started it, couldn't get beyond the first 10 pages.
• Beloved I think I read this? Looks familiar. Couldn't have appreciated it much, maybe I should pick it up again.
• The Blind Assassin
• Brave New World
• The Brothers Karamazov Again, a classic. Also the Russian authors get too descriptive for me. I need long, but lots of dialogue. If nothing happens on a page, I don't read it, and then it doesn't matter if its long because I skip most of the pages.
• The Canterbury Tales Read in high school, don't remember.
• Catch-22 I did read this, but didn't like it and skimmed most of it.
• The Catcher in the Rye
• A Clockwork Orange
• Cloud Atlas
• Collapse : How Societies Choose to Fail or Succeed
• A Confederacy of Dunces
• The Confusion
• The Corrections
• The Count of Monte Cristo Read in high school and actually did a paper on it. Loved it, although I hated the teacher. Or rather, I was just smarter than her.
• Crime and Punishment Classic. Nuf said.
• Cryptonomicon
• The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - No, but I would like to, if I could bring myself to read something that everyone is recommending.
• David Copperfield
• Don Quixote
• Dracula
• Dubliners
• DuneEats, Shoots & Leaves
• Foucault’s Pendulum
• The Fountainhead
• Frankenstein
• Freakonomics : A Rogue Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything
• The God of Small Things
• The Grapes of Wrath
• Gravity’s Rainbow
• Great Expectations
• Gulliver’s Travels
• Guns, Germs and Steel: The fates of human societies
• A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
• The Historian: A Novel Loved this one. Given to me by a co-worker, and everyone else in the office scoffed. Wasn't their style - great, its mine, and since nobody else wanted to read it, I felt I could.
• The Hobbit Never got through the first chapter. One of Ben's greatest disappointments. Too descriptive - BORING.
• The Hunchback of Notre Dame
• The Iliad Read in high school, no recollection. Is it good?
• In Cold Blood : A True Account of a Multiple Murder and its Consequences
• The Inferno
• Jane Eyre
• Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell
• The Kite Runner - Heard this was good, and its sounds like I might like it. Although its a bestseller, I'd read it. Anyone have a copy?
• Les Misérables - eh.
• Life of Pi : A Novel
• Lolita
• Love in the Time of Cholera
• Madame Bovary - good book, terrible characters. Hated all of them.
• Mansfield Park
• Memoirs of a Geisha - ahhh, a wonderful story. Things happen!
• Middlemarch
• Middlesex
• The Mists of Avalon
• Moby Dick
• Mrs. Dalloway
• The Name of the Rose
• Neverwhere
• Northanger Abbey
• The Odyssey
• Oliver Twist Dickens, too sad. I skip to the happy parts.
• On the Road
• The Once and Future King A fun read but skimmed a lot.
• One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
• One Hundred Years of Solitude
• Oryx and Crake : A Novel
• A People’s History of the United States : 1492-present - This sounds terrific. Who has a copy?
• Persuasion - Another one of those that I can't remember if I read or not. I think I did take it out of the library, but don't think I enjoyed it.
• The Picture of Dorian Gray
• The Poisonwood Bible : A Novel
• A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
• Pride and Prejudice
• The Prince Quicksilver
• Reading Lolita in Tehran : A Memoir in Books - Very good.
• The Satanic Verses
• The Scarlet Letter
• Sense and Sensibility
• A Short History of Nearly Everything
• The Silmarillion - Another one of Bens disappointments. If only....
• Slaughterhouse-five
• The Sound and the Fury
• The Tale of Two Cities
• Tess of the D’Urbervilles
• The Three Musketeers
• The Time Traveler’s Wife - read this in a weekend plus a day.
• To the Lighthouse
• Treasure Island
• Ulysses
• The Unbearable Lightness of Being
• Vanity Fair
• War and Peace
• Watership Down I love this book.
• White Teeth
• Wicked : The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West I love this book too. Really I do.
• Wuthering Heights
• Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance : An Inquiry Into Values I really did not love this book at all. Surprised and disappointed.

I would add to this list some of my faves:

• The Clan of the Cave Bear trilogy
• The Assyrian
• The Blood Star
• The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy
• It
• Rose Madder
• Orfe
• Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
• Books by L.M. Montomery, Cynthia Voigt, and Tabitha King - pretty much their entire collections.

Montgomery, Voigt, and King are usually considered writers of young adult reading. I myself read them in high school, but identified with them so strongly that I still really appreciate them.

I think L.M. Montomery is one of the most entertaining authors Ive ever read. Simple, enjoyable stories and enjoyable reading - and unbelievable funny.
Voigt - the part of me that is still 16 loves Voigts books, especially the kingdom series. Its unbelievable to me that my in laws are friends with the Voigts, and that they were at our wedding.
King - also appeals to Bethami of 16. Angry, righteous, rebellious, and vindicated in the end.
And there you have it.

Experiment with cake. And toy guns.

My experiment with cake works: applesauce instead of oil. I know its been proven before, but not in my kitchen, where things often don't bake they way they usually do.
I took a white cake recipe, substituted the white flour with whole wheat, white sugar with demerara (sp?), and oil with applesauce. It was a hit, and I can even convince myself that it won't destroy by body bit by bit.

Now we can have cake every shabbat.

If only they made munchies without frying them. Corn chips, cheese curls - something with a good crunch and LOTS of salt and MSG. Good for my gallbladder? I don't think so. Not on this side of surgery.

A protest: pre-teens playing with toy guns Friday night at shul is not holy. I saw this last night. And despite understanding that children here will, one day, be called upon to NOT desert our army, I abhor toy guns. Especially ones made to look like M16s. Especially when they are pointed, in play, at children under 5. Not cool and I told the kid off - only to receive a retort, "It doesn't even work." ?!!? Of course it doesn't work! If it did I'd be a hell of a lot more upset! Ah its so hard not to judge.

Also, a statement: creepy people shall not hold my child, or any future children I may have, unless there is no other option at the time.

Shavua Tov!